a plan….

Wow, decision made. Now what to do? Just getting to this point has been daunting in the decision-making process, liberating because I’m feel free in a sense and honestly a bit scary. In the back of my mind, “What if I suck at this?” Failure in anything is scary to me. It always has been. What if my ‘epic’ is an epic fail? When I work I have focus, a schedule and regular(ish) hours to keep. I’m accountable to my work, boss, patients and to the hospital.  Now it won’t be that way. Well it won’t unless I reframe my mind-set and make it so. Structure is key. So I need a plan.

These areas I believe are key to helping me stay focused and stay on track with my day and not end up vegged out in front of the TV eating ice-cream daily.

aww...ice cream

aww…ice cream

Regular hours especially during the week. I kept them while employed full-time. Besides my kids will need to be dropped off at school and my husband is up early daily anyway making his trek to the car lot. This isn’t a vacay for moi. It’s just a change in work locale and in my focus.

Continuing to present myself as I always have. I have heard and read about women who no longer bother to get ready to meet the day since there’s no one to get ready for. They take the kids to school in pjs or sweats. I’m not talking about VS cute sweats either. I’m talking hole in the knee I wouldn’t be caught dead in them kind of sweats. I have ranted on FB about pajama pants are not to be worn in public for years! Also leggings are not pants! That’s a topic for another day. FOCUS. First I believe we have ourself to get ready for. It is a shame to think I did all my primping to go to the office just for someone else. It is as if we don’t value our appearance for the sake of looking nice. Someone else has to see me for me to value my appearance? NO! This mind-set simply won’t cut it.This is my stance.  I believe how I present myself says everything about how I feel about my self. I have value and I will continue to put my best face forward and have a workable stay at home wardrobe that will not look as if I’m running to the gym, well unless I really am running to Zumba or something.

I will revise my wardrobe. I don’t need to be quite so formal at home. My heels and suits aren’t really what I envision for my attire going forward. This revision is going to consist of some heavy editing. I’ll donate, resale and eBay the items I no longer need and keep those that will work. I need to look presentable and my wardrobe will reflect my sense of style.

old work uniform inspiration

old work uniform inspiration

new work wardrobe  inspiration

new work wardrobe inspiration

A schedule for the week will help keep me on track. This needs to include: cleaning, errands, laundry, writing time, creative time and reading time from my Bible. Food shopping and planning will need to be included along with workout schedule too. Something along the lines of a daily plan will help this along. I’ve looked on Pinterest for ideas from other stay at home moms. There are plenty of great organized women who blog and share their tips to borrow from. (And, I thank them!)

An example of downloads available on Etsy to help get you organized.

An example of downloads available on Etsy to help get you organized.

I love my husband and kids so much. I pray my staying at home will benefit them and our lives will have a greater sense of order and peace. Yes I said peace. Chaos doesn’t breed peace and for a long time I have felt my life has been lived at a low-level of chaos. I believe a mom is the center of her family. My level of peace and calm and  how I handle our everyday lives are felt my every member of my house. Being the go to rattled person doesn’t cut it. And since I’m the go to girl not only in my immediate family but in my extended family as well I have some reframing to do.  I’m cool with this. I welcome peace. I welcome the work ahead of me to bring order from my chaos. I welcome balance. Bring on my planning session.

holly

IMG_0449

Advertisements

this is going to be epic…..

I have made a major decision. I’m quitting my job and staying home. Reasons?

1. I’m 43 and my kids are 12, 14 and 15

2. We can finally afford it

3. If not now then when?

In the past I have always been the family bread winner. Through divorce and a short second marriage I held it together and kept my family financially afloat. What I didn’t do was cultivate my inner voice. I was a some what crafty, Martha-esque young woman in my earlier years. I made wreaths for every season to decorate my front door. I decorated for every holiday. My first home was completely coordinated rich jewel tones of a hunting lodge with cherry furniture and a plaid couch. It looked like a English country hunting lodge. I had china, crystal, and fancy stainless for to eat and drink from when dining on special occasions. I planned meals, not everyday meals but events with my family and friends. You get the picture? Baby one then baby two slowed the creative juices a bit but also added another layer. Now I had them to focus on. I scrap booked every moment. I made not only clothes but blankets. I decorated their rooms. I even made baby food. Then my husband lost his job. Within that same month I was offered my first nursing managerial job. It seemed over night that I was put in the hot seat. It was 40 plus hours a week and 24/7 call. I didn’t mind doing what need to be done for my family. We needed to eat, pay bills and keep our health insurance. The kids dad was off for 9 months before finding a job. I remember the utter relief I felt. Two incomes again, yay!

The thing was I had changed. I worried about money all the time. I stayed in the job. What if something happened and he lost his job again or what if I lost mine? We had no nest egg. We had used up what little we had managed to save during the time he wasn’t working. Something did happen. My unit closed. But before you fret I wasn’t out of a job. I was instead of being out of work offered another management position. This one was managing 50 plus full time employees. I remember the conversation I had with myself. This is a great opportunity and if you don’t take it you will never know if you can do it. Well I took it on and found out I could do it. But what was the price?

I definitely lost my Martha status. I worked, worked , worked and then I came home and worked. I continued to do so through a divorce, a second disastrous marriage which didn’t last long and then I met my Tony. He has inspired me to again try to be who I am. We were married a year and a half ago. Since that time he has done wonders with his job as a car sales man. I know what you are thinking. shyster! He isn’t. What he is, is a hard worker. He has made a reputation for his self as an honest salesman. It’s because of him I am writing this today. He works hard to support our family and he has seen the glimpses of my creative side. I told him I wanted to write and he said go for it. I have a voice and I am putting it out there to be heard. I have so many things I want to do.

Decorate my home.

Remodel the kitchen.

Write this blog.

Writ a book.

Sew.

Knit.

Read.

Cook.

SPEND TIME WITH MY FAMILY!

You name it. If it’s domestic I want to do it. I’m so ready for this. Wish me luck. I’ll be checking in and posting my progress as a newbie stay at home chic. That’s it I want to make staying at home chic!  Hope to see you again soon.

Kindest regards,

holly

Emma and me at the symphony.

Emma and me at the symphony.

IMG_0050

Cole and Brooke my teenagers at the symphony