my top 10 to avoid when dating…


Just because I’ve made mistakes in the past and have made wrong choices doesn’t mean I want to continue to do so.  I want to finally get things right.  I, unfortunately, attract not so nice men, and the sad thing is I’m generally attracted to bad ones.  WTH? Right? Well, now that I know this I can correct it.  Below is my top 10 things to avoid when thinking of dating…

  1. Any man who stalks you at the gym.  He may or may not have a brain in his pretty head and gorgeous body.  But enough with the staring already.  It makes a girl uncomfortable.
  2. The guy on the roof, yelling about how good your booty shakes when you are walking down the sidewalk.  Honestly, you kiss your mother with that mouth and, for Christ’s sakes you are working on top of a Catholic hospital.
  3. Anyone I have dated in the past.  If it ended badly between us once chances are it will again.  People may change a little but at the core you always remain the same.  I don’t care what movies portray.
  4. If I’ve been married to you, I will not consider dating you.  See number 3.
  5. 63a2dc9b7c277754b69a384dd7cbb8f3I don’t do the friends with benefits thing. I’m worth more than that. Please don’t insult me.   It’s only cute when Justin Timberlake and Mila Kunis attempt it and having just watched the movie I know it got complicated, and feelings got hurt.  Their fairytale ending aside, it isn’t how I’m built.
  6. Anyone my dogs don’t like. They have a better sense of a person’s true intent than I do.  (No, my dog Riley didn’t like husband #2 or #3, and he generally growls when he sees #1 from his seat in my car at the kid exchange) Maybe I should get a sign that says, “If my dog doesn’t like you chances are I won’t either.” I know, I’ll hang it in my foyer.
  7. I will not date a man who is higher maintenance than myself.  I’m not speaking in the relationship sense, either. Any man who grooms more than I do has something wrong with him. Also, on the flip side, any man who has issues with my mani/pedi/occasional massage/hair rituals and facials needs to look elsewhere.
  8. If you are prejudice against any ethnicity, gender or person who is gay forget it.  I don’t need any bigots in my life. I’ve been exposed to plenty of them already.
  9. 23cbca2c574a94318fed582de384d032Yes, I’m a little damaged and a little broken.  I have been working on these things for a while now, and I know that no one can fix me but me. So signing up for the repair job isn’t a good idea. However, if you are a nice guy who can be supportive and understanding of a girl with a few issues I’d be willing to chat.
  10. Finally, this one isn’t a don’t want but a want.  I want a man who is respectful, kind, and patient.  I have a lot of knee jerk reactions these days. I wish I didn’t, but my psychologist says it’s pretty normal considering all that’s happened this past year.  Also, apparently I’m at risk for developing PTSD, so I’m trying to work through all that’s happened. I hear it’s the bottling up that gets you.
yep this is how I want to be seen

yep this is how I want to be seen

Oh my, this isn’t my usual thoughtful post, I know, but I needed to vent.  Yes, most of the things on my list I’ve come across since being single and today it got to me.  I hope you can see a little humor in these musings as I have. I mean, really, yelling about a woman’s booty while she is walking to her car? It’s so passe’. Dear reader I’m going to take a hot bath, drink a cup of tea and put these things behind me. I think I’ll hang on to number 10 though. Nothing wrong with wanting a nice guy.

candles, hot bath and a cup of tea,


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